Lucinda Cross on Speak Up Women

How To Be Crystal Clear When Speaking Up About Your Big ASK

Asking for what you want is the cornerstone of success. It has become more important than ever during the pandemic.

Upwork’s 7th annual study surveyed more than 6,000 U.S. workers over the age of 18 and found that 59 million Americans performed freelance work in the past 12 months, representing 36% of the U.S. workforce. That’s an increase of 2 million freelancers since 2019, who are contributing $1.2 trillion to the economy. 

Two million more freelancers are asking for what they want and receiving huge support. They are not letting a pandemic stop them. 

So what’s stopping you? 

While I believe asking for what you want is the cornerstone of success, some people just don’t know how to get clear on their ASK. 

Most people fail to get what they want, despite reading lots of books on success and goal achievement, because they skip the crucial step of Asking. They yearn, they hope, they hint, and they drop vague innuendos, but they don’t have a clear ASK.

  • If you are in sales, you have to ask for the sale.
  • If you go to a job interview, you have to ask for the job.
  • If you want a raise at work, you have to ask for it.
  • If you would like to get more acknowledgement from your loved ones for the things you do for them, you have to ask them for it.
  • If there is something that you really want to get as a gift from your spouse for your birthday, you have to ask them for it.
  • If you need help, you have to ask for it.

You. Have. To. Ask.

Here’s how you get crystal clear on your Big ASK

  • Ask someone who can actually help you – You need to assess carefully who can give you what you need. For example, if you are thinking of asking family members for financial help with a startup, don’t ask your sister who is newly married and has just started a family.
  • Ask with confidence – You can project confidence with your body language, the tone of your voice, by making eye contact, and by choosing the right words. Ask as if you expect to receive.
  • Ask directly – Take the time to prepare so that you are very clear on exactly what it is that you want. Then express your want as plainly and as directly as possible.
  • Ask with a plan – When you ask for something, you have to tell the other person what’s in it for them.
  • Ask consistently – Think about three-year-olds. They’re always asking for something, they won’t accept alternatives to their ask, and they aren’t afraid to walk away if they don’t get what they want. The same concept applies.

These clarity concepts apply to all areas of life. When you ask, be ready to encounter some resistance. Then, instead of backing away, deal with that resistance. Modify your approach, find the right person to ask, or wait for the right moment; but keep asking and keep your ASK crystal clear.

Learn more about Lucinda and her journey at the Speak Up Women Conference.

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